When we meet a family we are supporting there seems to be a common factor that all of them describe.

Anxiety

There are so many bereaved families out there that are struggling everyday of their lives since their baby or child died with anxiety. 

There are many different levels of anxiety an we see that with our clients. 

Some will experience mild anxiety where they struggle to do certain activities but it doesn't impact on their day to day life in to much of a negative way.
Others describe anxiety that can impact on their daily routines and they may need someone with them to enable them to get out and about to keep up with their shopping etc.

Then there are the families, and we see many of these, that are really struggling with anxiety. It is often so severe that they do not feel able to carry on with any day to day activities. 
Many describe feeling that they never want to get up out of bed let alone contemplate getting dressed and meeting anyone. 
It can often be difficult to even feel like they want to see their family, often because they feel that they will have to put on a front and try to act 'normal'.

Anxiety can become totally debilitating and at its worst can lead on to feelings of wanting to self harm or even commit suicide. I have had people say to me that they would rather be with their child than try to keep going without them.

This is when it is so important that these families have the help and support they need when they need it, even if that is the middle of the night. This support doesn't necessarily have to be from professionals, often there will be a friend or a charity that can be there to help them through the crisis. 

If you know a family or are part of a family that has lost a baby or child please keep looking out for each other, anxiety can not only affect the parents but any family member.

Helping a friend or family member realise that they need extra support can be a true life saver. Taking that first step of reaching out for help and support can be extremely difficult but knowing someone is there to pick you up when you fall can really help to seek extra support. 

Often having someone with you can make you realise that you are not 'going mad'. This is something we here a lot of, families that feel that they should be ok by now, so are putting to much pressure on themselves to 'get over it'.

One thing we have come to realise since Charlies death is that you don't get over it, you learn to live your life differently whilst always finding a way to include your baby/child. 

If families allow themselves to grieve, for however long it takes, they can often see that there can be a future ahead. It won't be easy and many will always experience anxiety but with the right help, support and friendship there can be a way forward.

A friendly face can make a big difference, so never underestimate how much you can help just by being there.