Yesterday it suddenly hit me that soon Charlie would have been 3 years old, every year since he died as a family we like to get together, thou as some family have moved to different parts of the country it takes a little more organizing, I have never been a great fan of christmas even when my children were little but i am even less so nowadays the 29/12/2012 changed me,
It made my loath for christmas run deeper, don't get me wrong i am nowhere near like scrooge, just the essence of what christmas should be about was lost a long time ago, whatever happened to a little gift and spending time with your family sharing a meal and laughing and talking, now days the pile of toys must be at least 4ft high with phones and tablets and laptops, but for me the run up to christmas 2012 i didn't want gifts or large amounts of food, sweets and drinks i wanted just one thing
                                                                          ONE GIFT. 
A gift that does not cost anything  i know Charlie's diagnosis was terrible and the awful words that my daughter and myself had to hear (incompatible with life)  the words that make you feel like you have been punched so hard that your legs wobble but that gift that so many people take for granted every day was totally out of our gasp, no money in the world could make this happen, you just can't nip to argos to buy this in fact no shop can ever sell it because that  GIFT was LIFE
Charlie's life was short just 19 minutes long but i have learnt over time that doesn't mean it's the end because Charlie has gone on to help others, he has helped shape future bereavement services, he has raised the profile of bereaved parents and baby loss  and how aftercare is so important.
And more importantly for me he has given me back what christmas is about because on the 29/12 of each year as a family we meet up have a meal talk laugh and share a small gift,

I work in a primary school and deal with children from 4 to 11 every day. I find working with the kids a good way of keeping busy and is my way of working through my grief.

This week I have found myself quite emotional and missing Charlie more than usual.

I have thought that it was maybe because we are getting to the time of year when we were coming to terms with Charlies prognosis but then I realised what had triggered it.

Halloween and Bonfire Night. 

I was stood at school on Thursday evening looking out of the window at the fireworks being set off when suddenly I was hit with this overwhelming emotion.

I felt so sad that we would never have the excitement of seeing the joy on Charlies face as he watched the fireworks zoom up into the night sky. We wouldn't see his little smiley face as he made shapes with a sparkler. He wouldn't have the chance to dress up as a vampire or ghost.

All the children at school had been busy telling us about which firework display they were going to and getting so excited.

We also held a spooky day and film night. The kids were dressed in some brilliant costumes and took great delight in trying to scare the teaching staff.  

It then hit me that Carrie & the family would never have that excitement of using face paints and trick or treating with him, counting all the goodies he had been given. 
We get to see our other beautiful grand children enjoying it and to see their excitement is fantastic. 
But for Carrie and so many other mums & dads this must be another reminder of the things they will miss out on.

We all take certain things for granted and it took me by surprise how much it affected me. 
There must be hundreds of families out there going through the same emotions as me as they watch other families taking part in the festivities. 

As we get closer to the next big family celebration, Christmas, please remember all those families struggling through grief and extend a hand of friendship. 

I am always very proud to say I have 5 beautiful grandchildren. 

They make your life so special and unlike when your children grow up you can spoil your grandchildren as much as you like, without having to deal with the day to day things. This is what all grandparents love to do.

I have been blessed with some pretty amazing ones;

Charlie, has been the family inspiration to stand up and fight for improvements to the provision of bereavement support. Without Charlie in our lives we would never have known the current inadequate support out there for bereaved parents and families.
Admittedly we would have much preferred to still have Charlie with us to be able to spoil rotten, but instead we have been given this role to take on in his name.

Throughout our journey since Charlie's death my 2 eldest granddaughters, Rhiann 9 & Amy 7, have shown such amazing compassion and empathy for other people going through the loss of a baby.
From the very start of us setting up the charity they have always wanted to be involved. They have helped at every event and have even helped arrange some. They have done things from baking cakes and helping sell them outside local shops, running tombola stalls during fund raising events and arranging for their school to hold a non uniform day. 
Last week they gave up a full day of their half term holidays to shake buckets and hand out leaflets at the Leeds General Infirmary. This time they were accompanied by their little sister, Mila 20 months, who drew in the crowds with her cheeky smile. 

Over the last 2 and a half years these amazing little girls have managed to raise £1000. 

This week is going to be pretty busy for all of us at Charlies Angel Centre.

The activities for this week began yesterday with us holding a bucket collection day at Leeds General Infirmary, Clarendon Wing.
We all arrived at 9am to set up for our day ahead. 

We met some lovely people throughout the day and they all gave very generously to us.

At 11am we were joined by Anna, Elsa & Olaf from 'Frozen'. The look on the children's faces when they saw them walking into the hospital was amazing. 
We were allowed to take them up to one of the children's wards to meet up with some children spending time in hospital. To bring a bit of  happiness into their day was wonderful to watch.
We can't say Thank you enough 
to the people from Jolly Tots Themed Parties for coming along and once again donate their time to us.

We raised a fantastic £257 towards the cost of a Cuddle Cot for the Rosemary Suite.

Today we have an interview at Bradford Radio to update them on everything that has been happening with us since our last interview which was back in 2013, so think i'm going to have to work hard on condensing the info as we have done so much. 

Tomorrow is our fortnightly Community Support Meeting at St Cross Vicarage, Middleton, 7pm - 8.30pm. 

Then to top the week off, this is the last week for voting in the Nationwide Big Local Vote. It would be amazing to find out that we had got enough votes to win the £5000 but to win any amount is brilliant and gets us one step closer to achieving our dreams.

We love being busy as it means we are getting our story and Charlies Campaign to reach a wider audience.

Being Nominated for The nationwide big local vote was amazing, never in a million years did we think we would make the top 3 and have a chance of winning £5000, for us to win would mean we could provide so much more for bereaved parents and families, the things we talk about and what we could do could actually happen, but we do need your help there is 1 week to go and we need you to VOTE & SHARE with your friends, family and groups, we are so grateful to everyone for your support in everything we do thank you Carrie. Sam&Clive Ruth&Gary xxxxx

http://your.nationwide.co.uk/your-rewards/Pages/competition.aspx  

Charity Collection Day

Next Tuesday we have been given the opportunity to fund raise within our local hospital, Leeds General Infirmary.

The main aim of the day is to help us raise enough money to provide the hospital with a Cuddle Cot, a specialised cooler that can be fitted into moses baskets and cots, allowing bereaved parents and their families extra time to bond and make memories with their baby.

If these had been available when Charlie was born we would have got to spend so much more time with him. 

Some families have even been able to take their baby home to spend a few precious hours in their family environment.


We would love to see as many of our supporters as possible pay us a visit during the day. We will be based in the Clarendon Wing, next to Costa.

As well as having our leaflets and charity goods we will also be having a tombola stall as we have found these to be fun and good money raisers.

We are going to be there throughout the day, so if you do see us please come over and introduce yourself, we love to make new friends.

We are now halfway through The Nationwide Big Local Vote. 

There are 14 days left to vote. As it stands we are 

currently 2nd with 31%.

                           WE NEED YOUR HELP 

To be nominated for this has been fantastic but to win would

be amazing. For Charlies-Angel-Centre it would mean

so much in terms of how we can move forward and 

help so many more people. If we were to win the 1st prize of 

£5000 we could help another 18 bereaved families access 

bereavement counselling over the next 12 months. We 

could purchase a Cuddle Cot, giving bereaved parents the 

gift of time. And we could provide an extra 100 Charlie Bear 

packs for bereaved children.

As a charity we receive no funding, having to raise money 

ourselves. Each year we put on various events to raise 

funds and rely solely on the goodwill of people like 

yourselves to help us.

So today we are asking you to take 1 minute of your time to 

click on the link below and place your vote. The support you

give us means so much to us. 

Thank you from everyone at Charlies-Angel-Centre.

Please share with your friends & family xx


http://your.nationwide.co.uk/your-rewards/

…/competition.aspx