MYTH: The pain will go away faster if you
ignore it.
Fact: Trying to ignore your pain or keep it from
surfacing will only make it worse in the long run. For
real healing it is necessary to face your grief and
actively deal with it. You may feel that the only way
you can cope is to ignore the pain but this will only
work for a very short period of time and in the long
run will only delay you on your journey through grief.
MYTH: It’s important to be “be strong” in the
face of loss.
Fact: Feeling sad, frightened, or lonely is a normal
reaction to loss. Crying doesn’t mean you are weak.
You don’t need to “protect” your family or friends by
putting on a brave front. Showing your true feelings
can help them and you. It can feel very scary to
admit your feelings but once you open up to those
around you it will help all of you.
MYTH: If you don’t cry, it means you aren’t
sorry about the loss.
Fact: Crying is a normal response to sadness, but
it’s not the only one. Those who don’t cry may feel
the pain just as deeply as others. They may simply
have other ways of showing it. Some people find it
hard to cry as they see it as a sign of weakness,
others have also said that they are afraid to let the
tears start because they don't think they will be able
to stop them.
MYTH: Grief should last about a year.
Fact: There is no right or wrong time frame for
grieving. How long it takes can differ from person to
person. Don't let anyone ever tell you that there is a
time limit on grief. Everyone is an individual and
deals with their grief in their own way. Some will
find it easier to express their grief and ask for
help/support. Others will hold it inside for longer and
don't want to burden others. Grief takes as long as
is needed by each individual.
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