why there's no time limit on grief

Probably the most common question we are asked is "When will i feel better?" It's a little like asking, "How high is up?" Grief is a lifelong process. While the agonizing pain of loss diminishes in intensity over time, it's never gone completely. It is absolutely normal to feel the aftershock of loss for the rest of your life. Grieving is not a reaction to a single event, like an illness that can be cured and from which you will recover. It's more like a deep wound that eventually heals and closes, but whose scar remains and still can hurt at times.

Don't put a time limit on your grief. And don't let others set one for you either. A broken heart leaves many people feeling stunned and stuck. Try to focus on the basics of a daily routine. Get out of bed. Take a shower. Go for a walk. Feel the sun on your face. If you feel fragile, limit your exposure to emotionally driven events. That doesn't mean to cocoon yourself away from people. some days are going to be harder than others, but taking one day at a time is a start 

Do Not Fall for These 5 Myths about Grief

MYTH # 1:

Grief is a negative experience which must be gotten over quickly. Life must go on. 

Truth: Grief is a normal, appropriate reaction to loss. Grief gives the individual time to do self-evaluation and to reconcile themselves to the change in the relationship with the person who has died. The only way to get through grief is to experience and cope with it. Embracing grief and its painful emotions leads to healing. In grief and loss, emotions are neither good nor bad. They just exist.

MYTH # 2:

Grievers are best left alone to grieve.

Truth: Occasional solitude can be helpful for mourners. To be alone with your thoughts now and then can be helpful. Mourners need opportunities to share their memories and receive comfort from others. Community and support systems play an important part in a healthy grief journey.

MYTH # 3:

Giving into grief and its emotions shows weakness, a lack of faith or spiritual strength.

Truth: All people, whatever their religious or spiritual beliefs or practices, experience grief at the loss of a valued loved one. Spiritual and religious beliefs can be a comfort and can provide additional resources to ease mourning, but they cannot eliminate completely grief or the pain of loss.

MYTH # 4:

Grief is a predictable process and takes place in successive stages.

Truth: Although common emotions and grief tasks toward healing are experienced by all mourners. grief is not a linear, predictable process. Grief is a progressive, individualized

journey to healing.

MYTH # 5:

Grief can finally end. 

Truth: Time gives people an opportunity to heal and to learn new coping skills, but the process and pain of grief can last a life time. The good news is that the intense mourning period immediately following the loss does not have to last a lifetime. Grief and the mourner change over time.